Monday, March 30, 2009 ♥
Its funny how long it's been since the beginning of it all, and yet, it only hit me today that im still living in denial. its nothing got to do with them, they are really very fine friends, but there's this tingly feeling inside me thats yet to face the truth. This is nothing temporary, I've told myself. But its not working. And i dont think, its gonna work any sooner.
Because the truth is, i still find it hard to let go. They say that if you really love someone or something, you've got to learn to let go of them. At the end of the day, if it truly belongs to you, it'll come back (thats the most cliche thing one can ever say) But no, I dont believe in that. Simply because it doesn't apply to everything and even if it does, it'll be one tough ride to the end. Damn right, its hooey.
Figuring things out never seemed so urgent yet hopeless. It's different here, but i guess all's well. I just wish we could have a little replay. I'd be really contented even if its for just a few short seconds; sitting in that cozy comfy classroom with legs folded in every possible way, being spared from the unneccessary judgements made by males, the fact that with every turn of my head I see familiar carefree faces. That priceless unspoken bond between us, it exists only within that piece of land. That, i've learn to recognise when i cant seem to find it anywhere else. And as much as I want to deny it, I cant. I wont lie cause the fact remains, I regret not cherishing the moments we had back then.
I wont do any the-people-i-miss-dearly list, that wouldnt help because they know for themselves who they are.I've never really gotten my mind around the idea of having huge posh parties just to celebrate birthdays. It's hard for me to understand that simple fact because its the simple things in life that content me. ironic. What more can I ask for when I'm already blessed with a bunch of really adorable friends who'd go all the way out for me? I appreciate all your efforts trying to pull off a pleasant surprise for me, despite some hiccups here and there. I really do. Besides the tasty chocolate moose cake (aww heavenly!), the enourmous bear hugs and warm smiles that I got together with all the birthday wishes are more than enough reasons for me to genuinely say that I'm a lucky seventeen year old girl. And, thats real despite me feeling that it was incomplete without the presence of many, who've always been there with me during the past years. So there, my 17th was a simple one but filled with so much love and appreciation, its hard to convey. Thanks guys, every single one of you. You've made it special ♥
I call it the redundant age.
random ramblings: @ 6:44 PM
